babyeridan:

my english teacher in 9th grade used to put prompts up for daily 5 minute writing warmups and one day the prompt was just the word “hippo” and i wrote a page long story in 5 minutes about an underground russian mafia that distributed hippo feces because they discovered that it had euphoric properties similar to marijuana it was like the new opium and rich people paid big money for it but it was illegal in every country and my teacher made me read it out loud to the class

(via puddean-pie)

passionpayne:

brittapperry:

But like in High School Musical how does Troy not realize that his teammates have a webcam on him like how dumb are you

He had his fuckin head in the game what do u think

(via puddean-pie)

furbysex:

how to tell if im dead

(via puddean-pie)

australiansanta:

blood type: hater

(via gr4cie-blog1)

dashofirish:

but why are people talking about bieber getting arrested when ed sheeran saved a kitten from being put down 

then he posted this on instagram 

and he made a twitter for graham the cat

graham posted a photo too

in conclusion ed sheeran is great and graham is one lucky kitten

(via puddean-pie)

horse-ebook:

darrynek:

*picks up banana* hello

its your son. he is dead

(via trust)

nopethatsnotraven:

if you ever feel down, just remember that at one point in her life beyonce has probably been confined to a toilet from explosive diarrhea

(via radical-illusion)